DC Asylum presents “Executive Orders Solve Everything”

(Nancy):  Your Presidency… you told us the American people didn’t care about process…

(Obama):  And they don’t…trust me.

(Nancy):  Well, it seems they are VERY interested in one part of the process

(Obama):  And what would that be?

(Nancy):  Article One, Section Four, Clause One

(Obama):  And what would that be?

(Nancy):  Your Presidency – you mock me – we both know I am refering to the mandate that federal elections occur on Tuesday after the first Monday in November…

(Obama):  November…No-vember… NO-vember….sounds like a month named after Republicans, doesn’t it.

(Nancy):  Your Presidency – what are we going to do?  We can’t afford to loose the House – we still have so much more to take over..I mean, take on..

(Obama):  Here you go Nancy… let me sign this Executive Order – your problems are solved.

(Nancy) I don’t understand…

(Obama):  It’s easy – by Executive Order, I decree all calenders to now only contain 11 months.  We just drop November.

Just remember folks – after the French Revolution, they redesigned the entire calender.  In fact, so have a number of other “Revolutions”.   So why would this be any different?



What Will Obama do About Iran?

Some folks who stop by here, might not be old enough to remember growing up in the 80s.  Sure, 20 years ago, might not sound like a long time ago, but apparently it is.  Apparently, if I remember the “auto-biographies” Snowbama claims to have written, he was probably drinking, smoking some weed, snorting some coke, but “not doing heroin”.

See, thirty years ago, we sat in abject silence as Carter floundered in his response.  How a proud American felt shamed watching our embassy get overthrown by a crowd of radical students.  How each day went by and we still couldn’t believe America, superpower that it was, was unable to rescue our own citizens.  Yeah… we’ve danced a round or two with Iran.

And during those same days, there were thousands of nuclear weapons pointed at us.   And we had thousands pointed right back.  It seems this is another lesson Snowbama has forgotten.  The strategic concept of “MAD”.

Mutual Assured Destruction.

In other words, you pull your trigger, we’re going to do the same.  Everybody looses, nobody wins.  And as insane as that may sound, apparently it worked, because the last time I looked, none is walking around at night, glowing like a street lamp.

And now Snowbama’s own admin is saying they don’t have any comprehensive strategy for dealing with a nuclear powered Iran.  Does he need one? Oh yeah.

Is there one?  Oh yeah.  Actually… I have two.  The first is “FLAT” and the second is “GLASS”

“Firm Limits Against Threats” and “Gauranteed Lessons After Superpower Strikes”.

In other words… they want to build nuclear capabilities.  Interesting.  They want to continue to threaten to use them against Iran.   And let’s not forget, by 2015, Iran will have ICBMs which can reach the U.S.

Yes, that’s right – the strategic plan I would propose is simple: Stop building your bomb, stop threatening your neighbors.  Or else feel the full ramifications of your country be hit so it is FLAT GLASS.

Of course, Snowbama and I don’t exactly see eye to eye on this one.  He’s introducing his own nuclear deterant strategy – “White House Insists More Pleas Expecting Results”.

Call it…. WHMPER

Any one want need a clue on why letting Iran have a nuclear bomb is definitly low on the Bright-Ideas list?



DC Asylum Presents “Redistribution of the GPA”

I seem to remember Snowbama touting how he was once a professor.  I wonder if we looked, would we have found subtle clues as to what he had in mind for the American economy…

Student:  Uhm… Professor Obama…. I was wondering if I could ask about the grade you gave me….

Professor:  Yes… what about it?

Student:  Well, every paper I’ve written, you’ve given it the highest marks, and I’ve never scored less than a 96 on any of your tests…

Professor:  True, you are one of the hardest working students in any of my classes.  What’s the problem?

Student:  I don’t understand why my transcripts only show a 3.4.  I don’t understand.

Professor:  I just want to be fair.

Student:  But why isn’t my GPA equal to my test scores?

Professor:  Well, as you know… Bubba has been struggling with the class, and he was in danger of failing out.  In fact, he only had a 1.1 GPA, and he needs a 2.5 to be able to maintain his sports scholarship.

Student:  But professor, I work hard for my grades.  Bubba…he doesn’t study at all.  He just hangs out at the gym.

Professor:  Now, there you go, stereotyping the less fortunate.  All I’m trying to do is level the playing field.

Student:  But professor Obama, I study 6 hours a day.  Every day!

Professor:  Oh, Glenn… you’re not taking into account how many opportunities you’ve had given to you.  You have all the advantages.  And even after I take some of your GPA and give it to Bubba, you will still be far ahead of him.  No, this is the fair thing to do.

Student:  But this is my grade.  I shouldn’t have to give up my hard work!

Professor:  That’s where you’re wrong.   The grade is mine to give – you haven’t “earned” anything.  You’ve just been able to benefit from all the advantages given to you.

Student:  I want my grade back!

Professor:  No Glenn….I was elected Presi…Professor.  That says all that needs to be said.

Well, I wonder how long the student is going to keep studying as hard as she did before.  Or worse… will she still continue to even stay in this school?  And what’s to say Bubba isn’t going to need “more” help come next year.  After all, why study, when the Professor is there to play nanny, all the way through school?



17 Minutes and 14 Seconds of Tap Dancing

Imagine you are one of those in the audience at Celgard, waiting to hear Snowbama answer questions.  What would you think when you hear Ms. Joyce Ravis step up and ask what has to be the perfect question:
“In the economy times that we have now, is it a wise decision to add more taxes to us with the health care, because we are over taxed as it is”.

Set your watches – it’s going to take 17 minutes and 14 seconds for Snowbama to tap dance, shuffle, and do everything he can to avoid saying “Yes” .. or even “No”.

First.. he dances to the left and brings up the 15 million – reminding everyone, this is for them.  And if they ever find themselves on the wrong side of a heavy medical bill, they would answer “Yes”.  He calls this “the Moral Imperative”.    This means he is taking the high road, and anyone who disagrees, is an immoral person.  Selfish, greedy, uncaring.  Want more adjectives?

But he still hasn’t answered the question about how wise it is to run the ship of the economy over the sand banks.

Then he talks about how the cost of health care is out of control.  Hhhmmm… I seem to remember, it is the hospital that produces the cost – the insurance carrier is the means we use to pay the bill.  The same bill from the hospital.  So.. this isn’t just about 15mil without insurance, it’s about slashing those hospital bills.  But you don’t hear any of the Progessives villifying doctors or hospitals.  You don’t hear Snowbama talking about the high 6 digit salaries doctors have.  And why not?  Because it’s a lot easier to go after the insurance company.  Much easier to make them look like they have the business ethics of a used car salesman, than it is to tarnish the image of the doctor.  After all – it’s the doctor who saved your life, its the insurance company that has to pay the bill.  Want to take a guess which one Snowbama is counting on you to join him in hating?

But he still hasn’t said if it is wise or not to place a heavy weight on the economy, just when everyone really needs it to start running harder.

He starts off by pulling at the heart string, now he has to shift gears and talk about what a great piece of legislation this is.  And how does he do this?

“Allows everybody to buy into this pool – that members of Congress, by the way, will be part of, so you know its going to be a good deal, because members of Congress, you know, they’ve got to look out for their own families.”

How about we do a double take on that one, Snowbama.  “Congress Won’t Eat its Own Cooking”

“Under the new law, they get to keep the insurance they already have, so long as it’s the ‘minimum essential coverage'”

What this means Snowbama, is as long as Congressmen have minimal coverage (which they not only have, they have coverage that very few Americans can even dream about), they don’t have to play.  So, stop telling America that they are going to get the same coverage as Congress.  Because you know they won’t.

And this is why Senators Charles Grassley (R-IA) and Tom Coburn (R-Okla) are pushing for an amendment which would require everyone (President, cabinet, Congress, Czars, and even their staff), to have to buy health insurance in the new exchanges set up under Snowbama’s plan.

Still hasn’t said Yes  or No…but he does say something very telling:

“so our hope is that over time, over the next three, four, five, six years, that we’ve actually saved money.”

Stop.  Hope?  You HOPE it will save money?  Sorry – i buy a lottery ticket and I hope I will win, but I don’t make it the center point of my retirement plan.  Snowbama, if you’re taking over 1/6th of the economy, you better be counting on more than HOPE that it will work.  And after watching big companies like AT&T, Verizon and 3M already step up and say how it will have a negative impact on their bottom line, it sounds like you’re hoping that the cost savings will not only offset the taxes, but will make up for the damage it’s going to do to business.

what’s with this weak analogy of the hole in the roof?  The problem there, is a proper analogy would be this “one house in a neighborhood of 50 houses has a hole in the roof – since the one home owner cant’ fix the hole, we’ll take 50$ from everyone of the other 49 houses, fix the hole, and the whole neighborhood benefits because now they don’t have a neighbor with a torn down house dragging down their property values.  So, for 50$, they can earn another 1,000$ when they do sell their house.”

sorry, it doesn’t work that way, and second – how many other ways are you going to come over to the neighbors with new “fix-it” problems for that one particular house.  Maybe next time, every neighbor’s bill will be $75 dollars, and when that’s not enough, come back for $150.  It will never end.

Someone “needs”…. you “take”….. and you have the audacity to call this “moral imperative”?

Oh…and please… cut it out with this Pay-As-You-Go…because your own party is still passing emergency bills for unemployment, but not wanting to adhere to this.  This is just another slogan that sounds good while you hand out the Kool-Aid.  You know it’s not being applied, but you have no qualms acting as if it is.

Look…I could go on and on.  On how you complain about the one trillion dollar deficit you inherited, but then two minutes later, boast about the nearly-one trillion dollars you gave away in forms of stimulus. (hey…if it was good, why are we still in a slump? Bet that was another one of those “let’s roll the dice and hope it works out”)

Bottom line… you yammer on for 17 minutes…and you still can’t make it simple… next time, just say “Yes, I think raising taxes, even in this economy, is a good thing”.  Stop tap-dancing.

No… on the other hand…keep it up.  You’re making November that much more likely to be a clean sweep.  And then it’s time to start another countdown – 2012.



Stil Not Enough Czars

Once again, I want to give a Hat-Tip to Harvey for sharing this with me.  We’ve all heard differnt stories about how Snowbama likes to just completely avoid the “advise and consent” by using Czars.  And sure, we’ve hear the Progressives come back and say this is no different than Reagan or Bush… but when a person gets a chance to look at the whole picture at once…. it sure looks different.  Especially when you see what some of the Czars are for…

Example…Greater Lakes Area Czar?  What’s next? The Los Angeles Czar, the Miami Czar, and the New York City czar?  And don’t forget the “Fly-over-country” czar (referring to that vast, open wasteland between the two coasts).

And if their specific roles aren’t enough to turn your head, how about looking at what some of these Czars have already demonstrated they believe in.  That should turn your head.  It should also be another reason to set aside a little bit more money for the upcoming elections.

Let’s take a look, shall we?

CZAR Czar Position Summary
Richard Holbrooke AfghanistanCzar Ultra liberal anti gun former Gov. Of New Mexico. Pro Abortion and legal drug use. Dissolve the 2nd Amendment
Ed Montgomery Auto recovery Czar Black radical anti business activist.  Affirmative Action and Job Preference for blacks.  Univ of Maryland Business School Dean teaches US business has caused world poverty.  ACORN board member.  Communist DuBois Club member.
Jeffrey Crowley     AIDS Czar Radical Homosexual.. A Gay Rights activist. Believes in Gay Marriage and especially, a Special Status for homosexuals only, including complete free health care for gays.
Alan Bersin   Border Czar The former failed superintendent of San Diego .   Ultra Liberal friend of Hilary Clinton.   Served as Border Czar under Janet Reno – to keep borders open to illegals without interference from US
David J. Hayes   California Water Czar Sr. Fellow of radical environmentalist group, “Progress Policy”.  No training or experience in water management whatsoever.
 Ron Bloom   Car Czar Auto Union worker. Anti business & anti nuclear.  Has worked hard to force US auto makers out of business.  Sits on the Board of Chrysler which is now Auto Union owned.   How did this happen?
 Dennis Ross   Central Region Czar Believes US policy has caused Mid East wars.  Obama apologist to the world.  Anti gun and completely pro abortion.
 Lynn Rosenthal   Domestic Violence Czar Director of the National Network to End Domestic Violence.  Vicious anti male feminist. Supported male castration.Imagine?
 Gil Kerlikowske   Drug Czar devoted lobbyist for every restrictive gun law proposal,  Former Chief of Police in Liberal Seattle.  Believes no American should own a  firearm.  Supports legalization of all drugs
Paul Volcker     E conomicCzar Head of Fed Reserve under Jimmy Carter when US economy nearly failed.  Obama  appointed head of the  Economic Recovery Advisory Board which engineered the Obama economic disaster to US economy.  Member of anti business “Progressive Policy” organization
Carol Brower Energy and Environment Czar Political Radical Former head of EPA – known for anti-business activism.  Strong anti-gun ownership.
Joshua DuBois   Faith Based Czar Political Black activist-Degree in Black Nationalism.  Anti gun ownership lobbyist.
Cameron Davis   Great LakesCzar Chicago radical anti business environmentalist.  Blames George  Bush for “Poisoning the water that minorities have to drink.”    No experience or training in water management.  Former ACORN Board member (what does that tell us?)
Van Jones   Green Jobs Czar (since resigned)..  Black activist Member of American communist Party and San Francisco Communist Party  who said Geo Bush caused the 911 attack and wanted Bush investigated by the World Court for war crimes.  Black activist with strong anti-white views.
Daniel Fried Guantanamo Closure Czar Human Rights activist for Foreign Terrorists.  Believes America has caused the war on terrorism. Believes terrorists have rights above and beyond Americans.
Nancy-Ann DeParle.     Health Czar Former head of Medicare / Medicaid.   Strong Health Care Rationing proponent.  She is married to a reporter for The New York Times.
Vivek Kundra   Information Czar Born in New Delhi , India .  Controls all public information, including labels and news releases.  Monitors all private Internet emails. (hello?)
Todd Stern     International Climate Czar Anti business former White House chief of Staff- Strong supportrer of the Kyoto Accord.  Pushing hard for Cap and Trade.  Blames US business for Global warming. Anti- US business prosperity.  
Dennis Blair Intelligence Czar Ret. Navy.  Stopped US guided missile program as “provocative”.  Chair of ultra liberal “Council on Foreign Relations” which blames American organizations for regional wars.
George Mitchell   Mideast Peace Czar Fmr. Sen from Maine Left wing radical.  Has said Israel should be split up into “2 or 3 ” smaller more manageable plots”.  (God forbid) A true Anti-nuclear anti-gun & pro homosexual “special rights” advocate
Kenneth Feinberg   Pay Czar Chief of Staff to TED KENNEDY.   Lawyer who got rich off the 911 victims payoffs. (horribly true)
Cass Sunstein   Regulatory Czar Liberal activist judge believes free speech needs to be limited for the “common good”.  Essentially against 1st amendment.  Rules against personal freedoms many times -like private gun ownership and right to free speech.
John Holdren   Science Czar Fierce ideological environmentalist, Sierra Club, Anti business activist.  Claims US business has caused world poverty.  No Science training.
Earl Devaney   Stimulus Accountability Czar Spent career trying to take guns away from American citizens.  Believes in Open Borders to Mexico .  Author of  statement blaming US gun stores for drug war in Mexico .
J. Scott Gration     Sudan Czar Native of Democratic Republic of Congo .  Believes US does little to help Third World countries.  Council of foreign relations, asking for higher US taxes to support United Nations
Herb Allison   TARP Czar Fannie Mae CEO responsible for the US recession by using real estate mortgages to back up the US stock market. Caused millions of  people to lose their life savings.
John Brennan Terrorism Czar Anti CIA activist.  No training in diplomatic or gov. affairs.  Believes Open Borders to Mexico and a dialog with terrorists and has suggested Obama disband US military
Aneesh Chopra     Technology Czar No Technology training.   Worked for the Advisory Board Company, a health care think tank for hospitals. Anti doctor activist.  Supports Obama Health care Rationing and salaried doctors working exclusively for the Gov. health care plan
Adolfo Carrion Jr.. Urban Affairs Czar Puerto Rican born Anti American activist and leftist group member in Latin America .  Millionaire “slum lord” of the Bronx , NY.  Owns many lavish homes and condos which he got from “sweetheart” deals with labor unions.  Wants higher taxes on middle class to pay for minority housing and health care
Ashton Carter   Weapons Czar Leftist.  Wants all private weapons in US destroyed.  Supports UN ban on firearms ownership in America ..  No Other “policy”
Gary Samore WMD Policy Czar Former US Communist.   Wants US to destroy all WMD unilaterally as a show of good faith.  Has no other “policy”.

Coming soon:  Internet Czar, Blogosphere Czar, Car Wash Czar, Kool Aide Czar, Make them drink the Kool Aide Czar, and the “Blame everyone but Obama Czar”.



Don’t get suckered by the new Drilling Announcement

Sure, friends of mine have been telling me “have you seen the news?  Obama is going to let them drill off the coast of Virginia!” 

And I’ve seen the headlines.  But I’ve also seen headlines saying Elvis was seen dancing with Monroe, and their love child is living on a UFO.

Folks – with this man, there is always an ulterior motive.  How about checking out “Obama’s False Promise on Offshore Drilling”.  You might find that this is nothing more than a “I need your vote, so I’ll give you this is you give me what I want.”

Better yet… if you think I am being too cynical (I know, typical Tea Party Conservative – not giving him a chance).  Remember, this is the same guy who only three weeks ago had Interior Secretary Ken Salazar “quitely” tell reporters the six-month delay in approving leases, would now become a three year ban.  And that was March 10th.  So…what happened to the three year ban?  I believe the article headline says it all. (The Obama Moratorium: No offshore drilling while he’s in office)

Maybe the most important statement of the whole article is the closing quote:

“So for the next three years and probably more, trillions of dollars in domestic energy assets will remain untouched while billions of dollars are spent on foreign oil.”

But don’t worry – if Americans aren’t allowed to drill in their own waters, someone else will be allowed to.   You may want to check out “China’s push for oil in the Gulf of Mexico puts U.S. in akward spot.”

Akward?  Only thing akward is trying to explain to Americans why it will be alright for the Chinese to drill, but not for any Americans.  I wonder if it has anything to do with all the U.S debt China is  holding.



Easter at the White House

If you were to ask my wife, there are a few special days I like to remember.  The birthdays of my sons, my wedding anniversary, July 4th, Veteran’s Day, and Easter.  Nope – Christmas is “special”, and while the day is full of joy, it is Easter that leaves me humble… it’s the “Mission Accomplished” date.

He is risen.

But, today I’m not able to spend this day with my family.  So, while most are celebrating with their own family traditions, I’m a few thousand miles away.  It’s part of what I do, and we’ve learned to accept it.  On the other hand, maybe there is one reason I’m glad I’m not back in the states. 

This way, I don’t have to watch Snowbama turn this day into a “political statement”.  Last year – egg roll, but only the children of same-sex marriages.  Not that I expect this “The-morning-call-to-prayer-is-the-most-beautiful-sound-in-the-world”, wolf in sheep’s clothing, Jeremiah Wright baptised “Christian” to be celebrating today for any other reason than self-promotion.

Because I’m about 12 hours behind in the news, I’m really curious as to what “special” way he has found to celebrate it.  Someone tell me – nail a quick post – get my blood boiling!  If we had an office pool – I would say he’s probably going to invite only children of parents who have lost their houses due to being bankrupted by not being able to pay the hospital bills because they forgot to cross the T’s on their insurance application.

Yeah… the Easter Bunny don’t like you Snowbama.   Want to take a guess why?